The Morning Report: How Tsheggy has been

So, I’m finally 25. Not quite how I imagined it would be,  but hey,  I’m grateful for the gift of life.

A lot has happened since my last post. My heart got broken,  I lost my phone,  I had amazing sex with a 22 year old, broke a few hearts and went a week without smoking. Exhilarating stuff,  no?  Let’s unpack all of these.

The Love of my Life sold me dreams. I thought it was finally our turn to be happy,  only to have a concerned boyfriend (insert dramatic music) call me,  asking me where his intended was. I’m still amazed at how calmly I handled the situation. I sat there,  listening to the guy on the other end of the line tell me how he and my weakness were meant to move in together. It is safe to say that until that day a few weeks ago,  I had never experienced true heartbreak at the hands of a man. True to form,  after the call,  I got drunk. I needed to to keep sane. The Douchebag (former love of my life) ended up not moving because his heart “wasn’t in it”. I wish I could hate him. Things would be so much better. I find myself falling for him again, against my better judgment.

I had a very exciting and passionate fling with a 22 year old. I don’t think i’ve had better sex ever…. Well, yet. I loved how much effort he put into foreplay and how he insisted that I cum too. This one morning, after too much cheap wine and a late night bath, he shaved my pubes. That’s when I knew he was a keeper. Unfortunately,  that was short-lived and now he thinks I cheated on him (I thought we were just fucking. Apparently not.)

I wish to not speak about those I’ve hurt….. It’s embarrassing and slightly juvenile how I keep repeating the same shit. One can only hope that in time,  they will forgive me. Of course that depends entirely on them.

I lost my phone on my birthday.  Scenario: Bored Tshego,  no plans for the day,  except work. Unsuspecting colleague/friend asks Tshego to accompany her to the launch of Africa Month. Tshego agrees. We get there and there’s an open bar. The rest really is history and self explanatory. I got shit drunk, was a bit controversial,  slept in the shuttle,  threw up when I got off and somewhere in between all of that,  lost my phone. No need to tell me how disgusting I am. I already know.

Anyway, work is going great, I’m going on amazing dates and I’m almost always sober these days…….

Good Morning.

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