My Depression Makes Me Treat People Like Shit

I’ve been on a social media break for the last two or so weeks. This was brought on by recent heartbreak and solidified by the recent death of my dog.

But during this period, I realised something I think I’ve always known: I treat people who care about me like shit when I go through these episodes. Then I end up feeling like a dick and suicidal. I feel like they’d be better off with one less asshole (pun not intended) in the world.

Take Doris. She and I have been friends since primary school. I’m turning 28 in a few days. She wants to bake a cake for me. What do I do? I treat her like a nuisance. Or my other friend Refilwe. I can see she’s trying so hard to be supportive and understanding. What do I do? I put a barrier between or relationship.

It’s like this with everyone. I guess subconsciously, I’m trying to prepare them for life without me. Or I’m just really a dick.

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One thought on “My Depression Makes Me Treat People Like Shit

  1. ma nigga,u stronger psychologically,physically n emotionally than u culd eva anticipate..it’s within our human nature to be down n not feel lyk anyone bt remember its also within our nature 2 adapt 2 any situation…u are strong,loved,cared for by me..Ntsako as ur friend,ur other friends,family n relatives

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